I've been having an exceptionally rough time at work lately. My boss and I appear to be in a state of constant conflict. For the first time, in a very long time, I hate my job. As a result, I've been steadily putting on weight (I'm an emotional eater), have lost energy and find it difficult to get out of bed in the morning. By 2 or 3 in the afternoon, I find myself staring at the clock, willing it to speed forward to when I can leave for the day. I've begun looking for a new job, but have been met with disappointment. There is not much need for assistant project managers in the construction industry at the present, and I am afraid I have pigeon-holed myself into that career as I have been in the construction industry for 10 + years.
This morning, 
fencerm2 had a wonderful suggestion, which I fully intend to utilize. His suggestion was to pick out 5 things I am grateful for, and to focus on positive things that will happen at work, and not anticipate having a bad day. so, while the trailer is quiet (my PM and APM are not in the trailer yet) I've decided to write down my list of gratitudes and how I want my day to go.
I am grateful for:
1. My family
2. My amazingly awesome boyfriend
3. My friends
4. My health
5. My cat
Today is going to be a good day. HLT will not pester me. He will not berate me, or irritate me in any way. Our meeting will go well, and I will be able to sit at my desk in the afternoon and complete the meeting minutes before I leave. All outstanding issues on my other job will be resolved, and my window manufacturer will declare that the windows are ahead of schedule and we can work straight through spring break and get 2 of the 3 floors done before the students return. My change orders will be approved and executed. I will get a phone call from at least 1 of the 3 jobs I am really looking forward to hearing from, and I will set up interviews for this week. I am going to sleep peacefully, and wake up tomorrow refreshed and ready for anything!
forbidnkis77
- Gratitude
- forbidnkis77
- February 28th, 2012
- War Stats
- forbidnkis77
- February 20th, 2012
lazy
1st battle: Makeup brushes
Cat = 1
Human = 0
2nd battle: Dining room table
Cat = 1
Human = 0
3rd battle: Daddy's feet
Cat = 1
Human = 0
4th battle: Washer/Dryer
Cat = 1
Human = 0
5th battle: Toilet paper
Cat = 1
Human = 0
6th battle: Daddy's plate of dinner
Cat = 1
Human = 0
7th battle: Repeat of dining room table (the tides turn!)
Cat = 0
Human = 1
8th battle: Repeat of Daddy's feet
Cat = 1
Human = 0
9th battle: Repeat of toilet paper
Cat = 1
Human = 0
10th battle: Dryer
Cat = 0
Human = 1
After 10 "battles" the victor is clear. All hail our kitty overlord! :)
- February 14th
- forbidnkis77
- February 14th, 2012
loved
Valentine’s Day. It has never been one of the holidays I felt the need to celebrate. Even now, with a nearly perfect life, I don’t feel differently. I have a wonderful boyfriend. We share a fantastic life and I couldn’t be happier. We adopted a kitten, Thalia, who has made our family complete. My extended family has always shown me love and support and I am who I am today because of them. My friends are some of the best (and strangest) people I’ve ever known. So, in a way, every day is Valentine’s Day for me, as I am surrounded with love.
I have nothing special planned for the evening; just a home cooked meal and some cuddling on the couch with
fencerm2 and Thalia. Maybe I’ll make a nice dessert to commemorate the day, since I did not buy fencerm2 the obligatory holiday card. The card he got me was perfect.
- The Muse of Comedy
- forbidnkis77
- February 8th, 2012
- ecstatic
I went to the Rutherford Animal Hospital to look at "Tracks" (the abandoned cat my friends found). He was not meant to be in the family. He needs something more sedate, with people who live a very quiet, steady life. Meg (now tentatively named Thalia) was in the waiting room of the hospital with a sign that said she was up for adoption. It was love at first sight. She purred, played and gave me large, soulful eyes. I caved. I texted Murray a picture, and after some discussion, I put in the application to adopt her. I didn't expect to be allowed to take her home that night, but they did.
She is not the silent type, like my Morgen was. She yammered the entire way home, and then promptly began surveying her surroundings. By 3 or 4am, by my guess, she decided it was time to settle down for the night, and after making sure she was given the proper amount of adoration by the thumb monkeys who now have the privilege of caring for her, she settled down to sleep at my feet.
I wanted to name her "Pfft," but that sent us into rounds of laughter, and we figured that wasn't a good idea. Murray recommended Thalia, and it seems to suit her. I offered to let her have a Star Wars name if he left us adopt her. But, he didn't want to call her R2E2 or Darth Mall (ANGRY!). Leia seemed to plain, and I can't remember the other female character's name, so clearly that wasn't going to work.
She cannot take the place of Morgen in my heart. He was more precious to me than I can adequately express. But, she does seem to be the right move as we start our new life together. And, just look at that face! How can you not love her?
- (no subject)
- forbidnkis77
- February 3rd, 2012
contemplative
Ok, so my close friend Bekki and her boyfriend were jogging yesterday when they stumbled across a cardboard cat carrier with a black cat inside, shivering in the cold, and meowing. There was a bag of opened, "cheap ass" to quote my dear friend, cat food beside the carrier. Appalled at the scene before them, they rescued the animal and took him to the animal hospital they take their own two cats.
They named him Tracks. He is a 4-5 year old, neutered black cat. He has not been declawed. He is negative for feline AIDs and leukemia. The assistant I spoke with wasn't sure of his eye color. The vet still has to examine the animal, and hopefully he will get a clean bill of health.
I want to go see him. But I can't afford to pay the vet bill. However, if I wait until they transport him to the Passaic Animal shelter, I can adopt him from there for much less money. But, am I ready for another cat? Can I have another black cat, knowing the will be at least some resemblance to Morgen? (gods rest his kitity soul). Can I convincefencerm2 that it is a good idea? Can I run the risk of the heartbreak of losing an animal again, though this cat is young and the chances are he will live a long life?
I can't imagine abandoning a pet like that, but they obviously at one time loved the cat, or at least, cared for it enough to neuter it and keep it healthy. They thought, as much as people like this can, to leave a bag of cat food. Granted, the obvious and logical thing to do would have been to surrender it to a shelter. But again (I do waffle a lot - I like to think of it more as analyzing and understanding a situation from all sides) they may have felt that they were "leaving it to chance" by leaving the cat to its own resources. Unfortunately, the cat carrier pretty much pokes huge holes in that. If they really wanted to give the creature a fighting chance, they would have released it from its carrier...unless they were afraid it would follow after them. Oh man, I really do need to pick a side and stick with it.
I know, logically, that this is not the right time to get another pet. We are just adjusting to living together, and keeping a pet is not cheap...But, this is the second black cat in two weeks who has been given up by its owner and in my power to give a loving home.
Sigh. At least we have the weekend to think about it, since we are leaving for K&Q tonight. And maybe, Tracks will be adopted by the time we get home.
Either way, I am calling Rutherford again today to see how his exam went.
- Life is good.
- forbidnkis77
- February 1st, 2012
- chipper
Yes, I know we haven't even had K&Q yet, but I'm already preparing for Mudthaw. I'm submitting a period bread recipe, with a cheese spread courtesy of Stacey, and making a tart to present to the Baroness for her subtlely contest. This means thatfencerm2 will become my guinea pig until I find the perfect proportions of ingredients and a recipe worthy of submission. My office, though they don't deserve to be treated well, will also get homemade breads and various fruit and meat tarts until I find the perfect dish to serve.
Cohabitation is nice. We are almost done putting stuff away and decorating. I halted picture hanging yesterday because I was tired and being lazy, and he graciously accepted my offer to watch a movie instead. "The Wisdom of Crocodiles" is a movie with Jude Law that I've seen a handful of times, and love more each time I watch it.
Went to the gym yesterday, and am looking forward to going back today. My SCA garb is a little tight right now, and I need to lose another 15 pounds before I am comfortable again.
I am looking for someone who can make garb while I am learning to sew myself. If you know anyone, please send me their info!
I look forward to seeing friends at K&Q and watching some good fights. I haven't seen much fencing lately, since I spent most of the last event in the kitchen (which was an insane amount of fun!). I have yarn to spin and mittens to crochet and a lot of catching up to do!
- Weekend
- forbidnkis77
- January 30th, 2012
- content
The weekend was a whirlwind of activity. Saturday morning, with the help of amazing friends, we movedfencerm2 from his house to what is now OUR house. While he went to storage to drop things off, several of us stayed at the house and unpacked. We re-arranged furniture, and put some of the chaos to order. When our friends left, we did some more unpacking and went to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy a new comforter set and curtains for the bedroom. Sunday, he went to the old house to clean, and I went to visit my parents before going grocery shopping. I then proceed to clean a little more.
I am adjusting to the additional stuff. is definitely a "collector" while I have always gone for the "minimalist" look (which just means I was too lazy to hang much on the walls and hate having to dust little knick knacks.) Our overall style, I am proud to say, works well together, and the little art I have fits in perfectly with his more substantial collection.
We then had dinner at Owynn's house. The food was amazing and as always, the company spectacular. We volunteered to be the next TOAD supper club hosts.
I have definitely decided on entering the baking contest at Mudthaw. Stacey said she will make the spread to go with my bread. The cheese she brought to Owynn's was absolutely delicious. I want to do the bread contest and the "period recipe" contest. Emailed them today to see if the period recipe has to be bread, or any period baked recipe. I bought a period cookbook (and I use the phrase cook book loosely) that has some tart recipes I want to try.
- The Last Night
- forbidnkis77
- January 26th, 2012
giddy
Tonight is the last night I will sleep in my bed. Friday night, we sleep at his place so we can start the move early on Saturday. Saturday night we will be sleeping in OUR bed, in OUR house. Sunday we are going shopping for OUR comforter.
Wow.
Scary and exciting.
- The cureness of my nephew!
- forbidnkis77
- January 25th, 2012
- chipper
After yesterday's horrid day, which ended by a trip to the doctor for my back only to find out I have an upper respiratory infection (fun), I was not looking forward to work this morning. However, upon checking my mailbox, I found the following letter from my nephew, Michael, age 7. It has been typed out exactly as he wrote it.
Dear Aunt Chris;
Can we have more sleepovers? It kinda reminds me of all the other sleepovers. I think your the most awesome Aunt ever! Let me tell you when I had a sleepover last. you and I played hide and seek and we watched "spookly". I was very fun!!
from, nephew Michael
P.S. Can you get rid of the clown, please?
In my defense of the clown figurine; it was my grandmother's. And yes, it will be put away before our next sleep over; which, will have to be coordinated withfencerm2 who will be sharing the condo with me in, as he said, 3 more days.
- Disgusted
- forbidnkis77
- January 24th, 2012
angry
Two weeks ago, I was home sick for 2 1/2 days. Yesterday, I was home after falling outside my condo and hurting my back. Apparently, this means I don't want my job. The troll, in his cruelest move yet, accused me of not wanting my job because I'm out "one day every week." Still can't figure out his math, but whatever.
To say I am upset would be an understatement. If it wasn't for Josephine, I would have burst into tears and quit on the spot.
I want to talk to my boss, but don't know if I have the emotional strength to deal with this right now. Instead, I am sitting at my desk, after being banished from the meeting by the troll, trying to finish up a project HE essentially abandoned, and failed to provide me all the necessary information.
I didn't, though I should have, point out that I am working on a 10 million dollar lawsuit, and my part of the case is almost at a standstill waiting for him to provide me with additional information. I didn't, though I was tempted to, point out the numerous other legal cases I am working on, without his assistance. I am running my own project, which I didn't want to do, but was left with no alternative. I am also supposed to oversee everyone else in the office to make sure they are doing their jobs. I am waiting for information from subcontractors to complete the project in Trenton (referenced in the paragraph above.) I have also been put in the middle between the ongoing power struggle between the troll and the boss's brother.
I don't know what else to do. I don't know why he has decided I don't want my job. Wait, I do know...it's because I'm not working 12 hour days or coming in on weekends anymore. Sorry, I have a life now.
With tears in my eyes, and a stack of paperwork in front of me, the last thing I should be doing is posting this, but I am too upset to focus on anything right now. I feel betrayed and indigent at his callous treatment of me. Part of me also wonders what hand my boss is playing in this. Was it under his orders that the troll has acted so cruelly?
But, enough of this. I must get through the day. I must formulate a plan. Pity party over.
